He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize