I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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