i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
