Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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