Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Randomize
