one might say we're banned from that church
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
