Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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