if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize