In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
