just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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