even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize