Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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