Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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