She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
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