I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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