4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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