Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
