none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
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