Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize