just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
