and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
