yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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