My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
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