yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
