Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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