ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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