remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
its not stalking. its research.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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