Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
