No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Randomize
