After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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