is your mom at the bar?
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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