how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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