i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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