? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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