We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
