You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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