I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
