WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize