summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
She swung at the pinata with crutches
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
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