It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
