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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  at least we're not in new jersey

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• (845): View more from New York

  Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (818): View more from California

  Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"

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• (714): View more from California

  I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  how did operation slutty penguin go?

  (619): View more from California

  pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.

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• (585): View more from New York

  I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.

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• (807): View more from Ontario

  Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal

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• (315): View more from New York

  So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...

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