I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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