Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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