sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i just wanna soil my oats bro
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Randomize
