foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
it's like iHOP with fire
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I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
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