Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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