I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
