So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it