is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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