They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
