I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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