i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize